Sometimes I want to quit

Hi poster, first, have you actually sat him down and had a genuine conversation about all of this? And if you have, was it done in a calm, non-confrontational way? I ask because if someone feels attacked or accused from the beginning, they will naturally become defensive, and then you may never really get to hear what is going on in their mind. I also wouldn't rush straight to divorce, especially since you both take your Christian faith seriously. That doesn't mean your feelings should be ignored or that you should simply accept being unhappy. What you're describing sounds exhausting and lonely. But before making such a major decision, I think it's important to understand *why* he behaves this way. There could be many factors. It may be how he was raised, what marriage and fatherhood looked like in his own home, how he unwinds after work, or something else entirely. If this is a pattern he has carried for most of his life, it probably won't change overnight. And trying to force him to change may only make him withdraw further. I can't really comment fairly on the division of housework without knowing more. Do you work outside the home? What are his working hours like? How are responsibilities currently divided? Those details matter. That said, feeling like a single mother while married is something that absolutely deserves to be taken seriously. My advice would be to start with an honest conversation where the goal isn't to prove that he's wrong or demand that he change immediately. Tell him how lonely and overwhelmed you feel, but also give him room to explain how he sees the marriage, fatherhood, his time in the man cave, and the responsibilities at home. Try to create a conversation where neither of you feels the need to defend yourselves. Then, once you've both actually heard each other, you can talk about practical changes together. Maybe that means agreed family time, more involvement with the children, sharing certain household responsibilities, or even speaking with a trusted Christian marriage counsellor or pastor together. Your unhappiness shouldn't simply be dismissed, but understanding the cause and giving the marriage an honest opportunity to improve should come before deciding that divorce is the only answer. I wish you the best in this, God bless you both.

17 August

Hi, I hope you are good? I just want you to know that a lot of women are on this table too..one thing I have realized is that most men that act this way are traumatized..up bringing matters a lot too..they probably grew up with absent parents and they just got used to being alone and enjoying their company.. I want to to initiate outings, maybe go out to see a movie, go to the park, go out for dinner, go shopping together..something that he actually likes…he might refuse at first but keep trying for the sake of your children..also you can call his attention to it once in a while..tell him the children always ask why daddy is all alone..and also pray about it because it can be very frustrating living with a physically present man but absent minded emotionally.. If he is friendly with outsider then there is more to it…

23 August